Baking 101

As a cook, I could probably rate a B+ for most efforts – maybe even an A on occasion.  Baking, however, has never really been my forte.  I can make a pretty good batch of homemade bread when necessary, but I really don’t like tackling too many recipes for baked goods.  Apart from the mess associated with baking, my concoctions rarely turn out as good looking as the pictures in those glossy magazines or cookbooks.  Makes me feel downright gloomy to do a comparison. 

Recently, my husband’s brother and his wife stopped by and she happened to pick up a magazine I’d been reading. Lo and behold, she found a recipe for an amazing looking key lime cheesecake.   Undaunted by the long list of ingredients and directions, she announced with consummate confidence that she would make this delectable delight within the next day or two.  Sure enough, we soon got a phone call inviting us over for tea and cheesecake.  Wouldn’t you know, it was absolutely scrumptious and the darn thing didn’t even have a single crack in it.  To my knowledge, that’s a rarity for homemade cheesecakes. 

 

Before the last morsel was licked from the fork, Sister-in-law had issued a challenge to me to bake one of the other featured cake recipes in that infamous magazine.  “Sure, of course,” says I with nary an intention of doing anything of the sort.  A week passed by and it’s no lie to say that the idea of baking any cake, much less one of those intricately detailed contrivances, had not even entered my head.  Along come the in-laws again and, I’ll be darned, the subject of the absentee cake came up.  Feeling slightly disconcerted, I took up the gauntlet. 

The next day, I got out my little notebook and proceeded to write a shopping list for the ingredients to make a “Mousse Cloud Chocolate Cake”.  The first instruction was to grease a spring form pan.  What evil mind created this contraption, I wondered?  After several minutes of fighting the thing before finally managing to snap the sides and bottom together, I gave the pan a liberal dose of cooking spray and valiantly consulted the recipe again.  Cover the pan in foil.  Now, why should I do that, I pondered, but did it just the same. 

 

After another quick glance at the directions, I began to combine the ingredients using my very basic little hand mixer which I think might have been given to me as a bridal shower gift many, many moons ago.  (That should tell you how often I’ve used it.) At this point, I was just tossing everything into the bowl and creating quite a mess all over the countertop, backsplash and myself.  When I checked the recipe once again, I realized that the vanilla pudding mix was not supposed to be part of the cake batter at all – rather, it was listed as a key ingredient in the icing!  Oh, well, too late to turn back now, I surmised.  Add candied ginger. What in the heck is candied ginger?  Finding a small container of powdered ginger, I nonchalantly added a dash to the mixture.   Thinking that I could lessen the splatter somewhat if I finished mixing the batter in the kitchen sink, I placed the bowl there but accidentally turned on the tap at the same time.  Then, in an attempt to drain off excess water from the cake batter, I unintentionally dropped a dish cloth into the mix.  The dog cowered and hid under the table at that point as the air turned somewhat blue. 

Into the bleep-bleep spring form pan went the batter, and I prayed that the high temperature of the oven would kill whatever germs might have accumulated during its preparation.  The final result looked pretty good, although not quite as it should have due to the fact that the vanilla pudding didn’t quite make it to the icing and the melted white chocolate squares refused to stay melted.  So, I improvised by combining Cool Whip with instant chocolate pudding for the icing.  Still, after what I had gone through to create the blessed thing, I wasn’t going to let it go to waste.  The in-laws joined us for a lovely dessert on the patio, with no one the wiser as to the story behind the mishap cake.  I hope my sister-in-law never reads this little tale!  Cake anyone?